There are things in my mind that must come out. I have no choice but to comply.
I find it incredibly difficult to express myself in the written word. it is not easy for me. Every word of all my posts have been a battle of flow, self consciousness and mental constipation. What I see and feel in my head are so clear but once it’s on paper or computer screen, it’s more like a Picasso painting; resembles something but can’t quite make out what it is.
So I read, revise, read again, revise again…. Slowly but surely, like a figure coming out of marble, the post will start to take shape. Might take days or even weeks but I’ll get that sucker out.
Is it supposed to be easy?
I can’t say for others if it’s easy but I’ll say that for me, it’s not. I have seen others write and they flow with relative ease and it can be intimidating to witness. Why can’t I write like that? Not only write fast but well.
I know it’s a combination of natural talent and practice. Of course lots of practice and truth be told, I don’t practice writing as much as I should. If I practiced writing like I do my guitar, I suspect I would be much better at it.
Maybe I hold myself at too high of a standard? Maybe I’m trying to torture myself a bit too much….
But hey, at least I’m doing it! I’m putting something out there which is something that I couldn’t say in the past. I used to let these ideas flounder in my head until they disappeared into the ether, only to make room for new ideas that I wouldn’t write about.
Just keeping writing
I can hear Ellen Degeneres’ voice in Finding Nemo telling me to “Just keep writing, just keep writing” and so I shall.
Good talk everyone!