Anxiety, authenticity, be yourself

Midlife Crisis: I won’t Panic!

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There’s a bit of reinventing myself or honing in on who I am at this point of my life. Some might say it’s a midlife crisis and maybe akin to that. I didn’t buy a sports car and didn’t run of with my secretary so at least I’m not cliche’.

Life is Good:

Life is good and I can’t put my finger on the unease and why am I feeling it… Maybe it’s because I’m used to the drama that I lived with in my previous life. I’m in a stable healthy relationship, I have a good job, my kids are doing well, I’m in a band and have fun with that… Just have the normal pains and stiffness of someone my age but nothing to get worked up over. So what is it? I’m realizing that I’m in the latter part of my life and I better make it count. My procrastinating nature has caught up with me and I’m starting to feel the pull to “make it count”. Just like an all nighter before that final exam, except this one is for keeps!

So what do I do? I keep telling myself not to panic. I’ve gotten this far and have done pretty well. I tell myself to soak it in and appreciate; stay present. Cliche’, yeah, but it means a bit more to me than 20 or 30 years ago. I don’t think I’ll ever be completely at ease and OK with where I am but I do like where I’m heading.

acceptance, authenticity, be yourself, gratitude, Lao Tzu, presence, Uncategorized

Tao Te Ching 9th Verse Thoughts

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To keep on filling is not as good as stopping.  Overfilled,
the cupped hands drip, better to stop pouring.

Sharpen a blade too much and its edge will soon be lost.  Fill your
house with jade and gold and it brings insecurity.  Puff yourself
with honor and pride and no one can save you from a fall.

Retire when the work is done; this is the way of heaven.

Woman relaxing after a job well done

Wayne calls it “Living Humility” but another way of presenting this is living in moderation.

Moderation:

 So take only what you need and ignore the Ego’s urging to take it all.  Having it all is not sustainable because the Ego’s appetite is insatiable and will never be satisfied.  Living in moderation is listening to your inner self, knowing when enough is enough.  

Presence:

This can also be a lesson in finding joy and contentment on where you are in this moment instead of longing for more.   Take solace in the fact that you are where you need to be at this moment and it’s perfect for you. 

What this means in my life:

  • Maybe not having that 2nd portion in a meal; something I always regret because I end up feeling bloated and uncomfortable leading me to feel “overfilled” as Loa Tzu mentions.  
  • When working in the yard or in my career I listen to my body and rest when needed.   Pushing it as so many of us do, will wear one down over time and the blade that “will soon be lost” is my health and energy.  
  • My motivation is internal and not external.  Praise, money, love, etc.. from others is nice but is it ever enough?   Only if the motivation and satisfaction is from within.  Listen to your inner self and you’ll become aware of that feeling of a job well done and there isn’t a need to “Puff yourself.”
  • Finally, live with an attitude that at any time, I’m right where I’m supposed to be.   

What does this mean in your life?  How would you apply Verse 9 of the Tao Te Ching?

Tao Te Ching 8th Verse Thoughts

authenticity, Compassion, Lao Tzu, Lesson, Listening, love, Uncategorized

Tao Te Ching 8th Verse Thoughts

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The supreme good is like water, which nourishes all things without
trying to.  It flows to low places loathed by all men.  Therefore, it is
like the Tao

Live in accordance with the nature of things. In dwelling, be close to
the land.  In meditation, go deep in the heart.  In dealing with others,
be gentle and kind.  Stand by your word. Govern with equity.  Be
timely in choosing the right moment.

One who lives in accordance with nature does not go against the
way of things.  He moves in harmony with the present moment,
always knowing the truth of just what to do.

There is so much to this verse that one could spend a lifetime contemplating and practicing the words above.   For me, it’s been well over a year of meditation, contemplation, brainstorming with others to clarify what this verse means to me.   I have struggled more than I thought I would but with time, came that clarity that I have been searching for.

Patience: Colorado River carving a path through solid stone.

Be like water:

Water does not discriminate; it will quench the thirst of all who wishes to take it in and so we must not discriminate in our service to others.  Water is patient and has all the time of the world. It can carve canyons out of solid stone reaching the lowest places Loa Tzu mentioned.  One thing that I have noticed is that once water reaches that lowly place, it’s not longer so “lowly”.  Water transcends, transforms and all who need water’s nourishment will come; no longer loathed by men. 

Wayne says to drink water silently and have gratitude for “this life-sustaining, always-flowing substance.”   With each drink, I will be reminded of this and will do my best to be more like water in my everyday life. 

Tao Te Ching 7th Verse ThoughtsTao Te Ching 9th Verse Thoughts